Dating a Married Man who is not Your Husband?...Take a look at This...

WOMEN, A MARRIED MAN IS NO ADVENTURE

In my short lived life, especially now when am in a transitory stage to real adult hood like I call it, I have met this one problem over and over again.

For many it might not be a problem really because most women tend to feel it is the most secure way of being happy with a man especially in this era and age when economic matters have really come in the way of relationships. When you meet certain middle aged ladies, they will always one in every three on my part come with the same story.

The stories always begin the same way: "There's this guy... he's soo great! We connect in every way and he makes my heart flutter like a schoolgirl. I know, I know... he's married. But we've only gone on a couple of innocent dates..." Then, the guy makes his move.

It is usually as simple as that. We all know very well where this is heading to, but all we can thnk of is that for now, this guy makes me happy. He is a sweet innocent man. And from the look of things including his deeds, this guy really seems innocent.

From the beginning, he just tells you what a great friend you are and he tells you how nice it is to finally have someone he can talk to. You eat it up, thinking to yourself, Yes, talking. That's all we're doing. But then he finally does what he's wanted to do for a long while he makes his move.

Would you dare Brag about this even if you don't really care about your sweet self?...

Because you have been feeding on all the cooked lies and games he has been giving you, Now you think, after all he is just a good friend. I can do this with him.

Of course, he springs it upon you ever so slyly, making you feel really special, making you feel unique. He'll say things like, "Wow, my wife just doesn't listen to me like you listen to me," or, "She just doesn't understand me. And it's really nice to be with a woman that does."

He will tell you this over a glass of Wine, a bottle of beer or even next to his car seat.

You keep taking all the lies.

Sometimes this guy probably dated you sometimes back even before he got married, but now after marriage he comes back to you and swears that he regrets his move and wishes he had married you. Now he woos you into going even further with him And this is done in SECRET.

And sure, on the surface he looks like the A great Dad, Lover and Partner. He might go further to telling everybody that it's OK that his marriage isn't passionate, that he's grown so much as an individual that he doesn't need wild, fulfilling sex anymore. He would not even bring up the subject in the name of that not being his PRIME GOAL.

It is quiet obvious that, most of our African marriages had been planned. Sometimes Men are forced to marry women they never really liked in the beginning. They hope to love them eventually. Issues can happen. This woman is probably pregnant, she got sturbon and this husband is looking for a way out for escape. He'd rather have somebody that would be a great mother than someone with great passion because 'passion dies.' he knows this well that is why he probably chose to marry whoever he did. But now here comes you who is available for him and he likes it that way.

And it's sad, because he's convinced himself that he's in a relationship that he wants.

But he's not. He's sad, he's lonely, and he sees you as an opportunity for escape.

Sometimes you might not really know whether this guy is married or not. But trust me, in today's world, where Honesty has become the best policy even in crime, Married men tell it loud. They approach you with a wedding band on their fingers and shamelessly ask you out. You do not need a microscope to spot one.

So, how do you at least know his mission in the early beginning? Well, he's usually the guy you meet who immediately wants to be your "friend." Yet, these men aren't just friends with women. They're only friends with women they're attracted to. Because that's how it starts, with a mental affair. He'll frame your interaction as business, like, "Hey, let's have a business dinner," or "Hey, let's grab a drink after work." He'll talk to you, check you in ways that seem all so innocent. But let me tell you something: It's not. Because this so called "happily married man" is not happy.

He's going to flirt with you innocently. He's going to send you little texts to tell you that he read an article or saw something that reminded him of you, and it's all going to seem so friendly, almost like you met a good female friend.

But in reality, he's planting the seed for your future affair.

He'll even tell his wife about the great friendship the two of you have. He'll bring it out in the open, because he doesn't want to believe that he is actually going to cheat.

These kind of guys are there. I have met a lot of these guys. They talk such a good game, but in reality, they're living a compromised life. They wanted something from life but never truly believed that they could have everything. And now they find themselves "stuck" in a situation that's displeasing and less than what they know is possible. Sometimes they could be happy where they are, but just not satisfied probably due to their selfish ways of life.

Beware. Never, ever get influenced by their flattery. They're not going to leave their wives. They're looking for an affair, whether it is mental, emotional, physical or all three. Be aware of these warning signs.

Ask yourself what it is that you want, and why you're drawn to these men that you can't have. Maybe there is a tiny bit of loneliness and lack of fulfillment within you, and that is attracting men in similar situations, many of them married.

Look at the people who are coming into your life as signposts for what's going on inside of you. If you find yourself becoming excited by the overly-friendly man in the wedding ring consider that you may have some internal issues to work out.

And then run preferably in the direction of available men not hampered down by preexisting relationships.

I always share this with my girlfriends, I remember meeting some of them over dinner last weekend, we shared a lot plus, I had to tell them this one thing. If you feel you are attracting certain types of men, who are not really preferable or who you do not think are the type of men you would prefer, hold yout horses, sit back and think about your inner self. What is is with you that you end up attracting these kind of men over and over again?

It is high time you thought of what you want, analyze what it is you have that attract the wrong kind of guys that come your way and change it for the better.

It is high time you got to realize why you should not date a married.

He is married to some other guy for Christ's sake. The fact that he is cheating on his wife tells you how he can deal with situations. With you for instance or with somebody or something he does not like. Remember this will always make you a side dish. ALWAYS.

You are not getting any younger. Get a life and move on. Remember this can be a very painful experience. Every night, he has to go home to his wife and kids because he’s simple not yours.

Even if he does not now he will sometimes soon.